That's a good question. I'm not sure what is the answer to your question. I'll do some research and get back to you if I got an good answer. You should email the people at Medifast as they probably could give you an answer..
Boy do I know the stupid feeling, uggh..
I can't do much.
But I think I have an idea; can you get your kids and husband to.
With you? Make it a game, dance, walk, whatever as a family. Make it fun..
I am 48 and just started wearing makeup regularly since my.
I never put the effort into it because I felt I was, or wanted to be invisible. Now that people are looking I want to look put together. kwm?.
As far as clothes go, could you change the look with accessories. Maybe.
The t-shirt untucked and belt it to show off your.
Buy a white muscle shirt and wear it under the shirts that are falling off. The layed look is in and it provides a little modesty..
I am praying that your mind catches up with your body, because you have worked so hard and it is time to feel the very best..
BTW Glad you are back..
Former Callie please allow me to introduce to you New Callie. She is kind of shy and her self esteem took a beating from years and years of being told she is stupid either by actions or words..
Please be patient with her. She is.
Who she really is. Or should I say, who she is to become. You know her really well. She is no different than you and still she is struggling to know the real Callie..
I know what you are.
About sweetie. Don't feel you have to.
If it makes you feel stupid. How about bike riding or just a whole lot of.
? Don't worry about make up or hairdos. Katherine Hepburn was an elegant beautiful actress who balked at the idea of wearing makeup and fancy clothes. She didn't like to shave her legs either. lol.
My strongest suggestion for you right now is to go try on some new clothes. Even if you do not buy any. Just try them on and see what size you are wearing now. I buy a ton of my clothes at the second hand store. I look for new labels that look like they have never been washed and always smell them to be sure they were not previously owned by a smoker. But right now take yourself to a clothing store and try on several sizes of the same style.
You start feeling better soon. I'm saying special prayers for you...
Party poppers, balloons and jelly and ice cream...... Callie posted..
Its ok to feel stupid sometimes as long as we feel that way and can laugh at those laughing at us and just feel sorry for them..
Their are some wonderful replies allready and results speak for themselves. You have done something right to achieve such results..
Beit a stay at home mother or not, you have surpassed expectations I am sure..
Sure, our self esteem gets hit real hard overtime, fat people take the brunt of most humour and some of the hurt lingers....
Making fun of the exercising might help... if it's raining go puddle stomping with the kids...Your get one heck of a work out trying to soak each other...
The fella can give you another sort of work out...if you let him.... and you can get some extra protien in...
To cut a long post short, dont beat up on yourself, their are plenting doing that for you.. but for every nasty thoughtless moron that drags you down you have their are twice as many friends on here..
Your under a lot of pressure right now, it's the most emotional time of year.... and under the circumstances you actually keeping it together.....
Your sister I am sure would have fun with some girly makeovers if you ask, it will give you some well deserved time out... try it... I bet your laugh your socks off.....
A flower is blooming......
Stupid is as stupid does.. Tom Hanks Forrest Gump. Not sure what it means I never really understood.... see me stupid....
Love ya Callie..
You will find yourself.....
Dont feel stupid unless it's a pet name for your hubbies member....lol then feel stupid lots.....
I think you should try to find the new you. You are a stay at home mom and maybe you don't do makeup at home, but maybe you could commit to doing it when you go out anywhere even if it just to the store. You will feel better looking at yourself and others treat you better. Now, how to find what works, go to a department store and let them make you up. Walk around until you see someone that you like the way their do their own makeup. Tell them what you think you like or don't like.
You don't have to buy anything right then. Ask them to write down what they used, and let them you know you want to see how wears over the day. You want away with a list of what they tired on you and you could go back later, or go to a drug store and find cheeper makeup..
As for clothes, if you are still loosing, try 2nd hand stores. They are so much cheaper and you will not feel bad when they don't fit in another month. But only buy what you think looks good on you. If you don't watch What Not to Wear you should. Turst me I don't do everything they say, but I found it very helpful when I was looking for some clothes. It helped me to understand why something did or didn't work on me, then with that in hand, I was able to look and rule out a bunch of stuff without trying them on..
You are doing so well, you have to try to make your outside look good to you... it isn't easy, and at times it's very hard to have all the attention but give it a try, you will feel better...
All good advice Callie, just wanted to say I missed you!..
Callie.......so happy to see you....you were so very missed and you need to know that..
I didn't always have a weight problem, in fact I was really skinny in my younger years. During my pregnancy for my second and last I started having alot of hip and back pain, one leg was really bothering me. After he was born, the problems were still there. As the years went by, it started bothering me more and more, and I was ballooning up in my weight..
While I worked I managed to keep my weight ranging from about 210 to 220, then in 2004, my illness really reared it's ugly head. Within 1 1/2 year my Dr. took me off 40 plus hours a week and cut me back to no more than 20. I stayed at that (although I did work usually 25 to 28 hrs) for 6 months and then on May 2, 2006 he told me I was done, that I would never work again..
Well sitting home, and I do mean sitting,.
Hurt like hell, so I sat, and sat, and sat. Within a year I was at about 270 and then wow the end of 2008 to July 30 of 2009 I skyrocketed to 338..
I know the feeling stupid thing, as I was my worst enemy on this one. Not only was a morbidly obese, I walked with a quad cane, or I had to be in my wheelchair or powerchair. I just knew that people would look at me and be thinking........"loose weight fatass and you'll be able to walk fine".......so I never wanted to.
The house, and if it wasn't for my husband and mother, I never would have left the house, but they would force me out, at least twice a month, unless I had a Drs appt..
When I really had it in my head that my son was embarrassed of me, which later he revealed he wasn't, he was scared for me, thinking if he left in the service that he'd get that Red Cross notification to his Superiors that I passed. Wow, my wake up moment........he wasn't embarrassed by me........he was afraid to lose me. I still haven't told him that he was the final factor in my soul searching and deciding that GBS was what I had to do..
Now I still struggle, because I'm still very fat, but I do force myself to get out of the house more. I keep reminding myself that those people that would be thinking........".
And you'll be able to walk fatass", will soon see that even with the weight off, my skinny ass still won't be able to walk to much, and I'll still have maybe a reg cane, and need my wheelchair and powerchair..
Our internal struggles are our biggest demons........we need to be able to deal with them, to find our true happiness. For me it might be seeing the lightbulb realization moments on people's faces, when they realize that something was wrong with me, and it wasn't just my weight..
I try to put on makeup whenever I.
The house, I don't bother at home. I did have my hair done........that made a good sized difference in my mood. Now I get compliments on not only losing the weight, but my best friend told me it's the best hair style she thinks I've ever had..........little steps are building big highs..
Even if you don't want to wear makeup all the time, maybe just some mascara, and a lip gloss. As far as the loose clothing......you can belt a top, layer with a tee or a sports bra. Your pants, you can do a quick intake on the inside of course, if you wear a big longer shirt, it will hide where you sewed (took) the top sides and hip areas in..
As for the exercising and.
........I only wish I could do these things........I think you can make it a funtime activity with the kids,.
Around doing the happy dance and hey let's throw in a couple of these (insert a few.
Routines)........you can lock yourself in your bedroom or bathroom and do some.
And exercising. Dr. Oz says the best form of.
And it helps you to live longer is sex.......I'm sure hubby would want to participate in that activity......LOL..
Wishing you luck, stay with us............we need you..
Oh no sweetie! So sorry you are feeling that way. I can only imagine how weird it feels to be in an unfamiliar body. Your feelings are are normal. It may take some time to embrace the new you. You are still the same glorious woman you were before.
You may want to consider going to a hair stylist that you trust and have her or him make some easy styling tips or perhaps a new haircut. As far as clothing goes...you may want to find a personal shopper (many are free in larger department stores. Make an appointment and let this person know what you are up against. If you do not connect with that person..then go somewhere else until you do find someone that you can work with. You may also have a girlfriend that you trust go shopping with you and ask her to be honest with you about how the clothes look on you. I know that money is a concern, but if you can purchase just a couple of items that fit well that you can mix with other peices you have..
My heart goes out to you today. It will take time to get used to the new you. Please be patient. I am new to this group, but I can tell already that you have one heck of a cheering section..
Paralyzing fear and anxiety convey to me issues not directly related to WLS. Are you seeing a therapist or other MHP? Are you getting support for your body issues from someone who knows how to move you away from feeling "stuck"? I hate to see anyone suffer when there is all kinds of helps available. I.
You will love the young, unsure, awkward-feeling Callie inside and try to do everything you can to help her...
Callie, please don't feel stupid. I think alot of us still fight the demons like someone else said...all our lives we hid behind the "fatness" and now we're finally realizing our true potential!! I too have issues at the gym, even tho I've lost 123 lbs...I still feel like everyone is staring at me and thinking "wow she's fat". When I see pictures of myself these days I can't comprehend who it is because to methe person in the picture is NOT me. I'm used to hiding behind the old me. Like Patricia saidI've been dieting since I was little...I was to be the flower girl in my Aunt and Uncle's wedding...they sent me to.
Because I was too "chunky". I too have never really messed with makeupI felt it was too time consuming, and thought who really cares, but you know whaton the occasions that I take the time to put a little onthe comments are amazing. It's ok to pamper yourself and take care of YOU. You've been taking care of everyone else all your life!!! :) Callie you're worth it!! I know things are rough for you and your family right now. The suggestions of a belt and layering under the "bigger" clothes is a cost effective way to "rejuvenate" some of your wardrobe. Is there a local support group that possibly has a clothing exchange? Or let us know what size, I'd be more than happy to look at our clothing exchange and send you some new "fresh" items...!!! :) We're all in this together and can support each other through the thick and thin!!! Reach out to us girl...we're all here for you!!! :).
How do you get over feeling stupid?.
I have spent a big portion of my life being obese. I have always felt stupid at just about everything I tried to do. And having lots of people around seeming to laugh behind your back, when you do try doesn't help. I know someone out there knows what I'm trying to say here..
I am finding it a little hard now to let go of these feelings. One example is that I can't get over feeling stupid when I exercize. I.
It at all costs if someone may see me, which is all the time between my kids and husband being home. Why can't I just exercize in front of my family? Why am I so scared of feeling stupid here?.
Also when it comes to appearance enhancing. Like styling my hair or doing my makeup, I feel really stupid trying that. I pretty much always where a pony tail, and no makeup. I'm a stay at home mom, so I don't really see the merit of all the effort. But I wish I didn't feel so stupid just trying a little change..
And I feel really stupid in clothes right now. All my shirts I used to love to wear are all huge tents and fall right off my shoulders. Crazy. I have 2 pairs of jeans that fit, everything eles is either falling off my butt, or sweats with drawstrings. I feel like I'm in the awkward stage of this game. I feel stupid because I don't know what clothes will fit me, and don't really have the money to buy new ones right now..
I know that all this feeling stupid all the time is giving me so much anxiety and panic that I am.
Up. I feel really good about myself, but can't seem to allow myself to do certain things. I guess I'm just not used to this new person's body I have now. 145+ lbs gone in under a year is very shocking for me. I really like this new body, but I feel like it's not really me, ya know what I mean. I don't feel like I fit yet, I guess.....
Miss Callie you are far from being stupid!!!!!!! and I must insist you stop calling yourself that... someone told me when I would degrade myself it just intensifies the feeling... If I would say "oh I'm a fat pig" or I look like crap.... etc.... You have to be good to yourself... You have done an amazing thing by doing the GBS and losing 145 in under a year!! Give yourself credit where credit is due!!! I;m relatively new on here, but I hear such great things about you that you MUST be a beautiful, smart, great and caring person....
Like they always say - if you cant say something nice dont say anything at all... Practice looking in the mirror and saying "I'm beautiful, people love me, I have all my friends on DS that care a great deal about me and I'm gonna get thru this phase and we're all here to help you :).
Xoox you are in my thoughts!!!!.
I go for my.
Wednesday am... I'm a little nervous, but not so much, because of everyone on here... and also my sister "froman67" had her.
Monday and she is doing pretty darn good so far :).
Oh God, Callie,.
When I joined this board last November you were (and are) one of the smartest, kindest and most caring people posting. You may feel stupid but you're not! If you reread your post - it's all about how you look, not who you are. Your intelligent and upbeat responses to other folks questions have served as a reference point for many of us. I know that you're having some problems with anti depressent meds and I sure.
That you can find a solution. In the meantime follow some of the other ideas here about shopping. And do something, go for a walk, puddle jun\mp (that one souned like fun) with your kids - little ones know that what you look like is Mom and Mom is beautiful..
Take care of yourself, I don't think you are seeing clearly what everyone sees well. YOU ARE BEAUTIFUL..
And the only.
I do in front of my husband is walk and then I'm usually behind because he'e faster...
Callie! I'm so sorry you feel so bad!! you are such a sweet helpful person to all of us!! We have all felt stupid. I have to say you have been on a huge endeavor and have lost so much weight and now you can't hide behind it anymore. Try some new hairstyles or makeup. Look in some magazines for styles that you like. Or even call on Avon or Mary Kay. They will come over and do a little makeover for you! Avon is very affordable, too and a lot of reps have samples to give.
You are just shy with the new you and trust me, we all feel that way!!! I think once you start making yourself over, slowly but surely, you will start to feel a little better!.
WE ALL LOVE YOU, CALLIE!!.
This is a really tough subject for a lot of us. Most of us spent our lives on the sidelines being the one behind the camera never wanting to have our pictures taken! I think that has made a lot of us turn into caretakers as well where we put everyone else ahead of us and stayed on those sidelines feeling like we werent worthy. I can understand why you don't feel like getting yourself all made up and why it may seem strange. I too had no idea where to go to buy clothes or what to even wear that I wasnt getting out of the big and tall section that was hideous looking to start with.. lol.
After years of feeling put down and worse yet putting ourselves down through negative self talk and self hartred over the lives we were not in control of it only stands to reason to feel this way. We have all felt like failures after numerous attempts at losing weight and from having to put up with evil glares and nasty comments behind our backs as well as right in our faces over the years. The thing we have in the back of our minds now is that we will wake up one morning and the weight loss will have been a dream.. and we will be our old fat selves again. We arent used to the success and know how to handle it. We hate the compliments and the attention because all of the attention we had before was negative so we question peoples motives when they do..
Was on our insides not our minds and it takes a long time to catch up.. I am still not there yet myswelf Callie and we had he.
At the same time. When people look at me now I wonder if they are thinking I look too skinny.. which is what I hear most of the time now.. it sucks!!! "You need to stop losing weight.. you're getting too thin" I mean come on people!!! So yeah people suck!!.. hehe..
I also think one of the main reason we struggle with this is because of societies misconception that this.
Is all about vanity and weight loss.. and the fact that people dont know the co-morbidities we once had and the real reason we made the choice to have this.
People will always judge us for one thing or another whether we like it or not..
I will turn 40 this spring and I have adopted what I believe to be a "f*ck-it" mentality when it comes to putting myself down and putting up with peoples crap.. that was my new years resolution.. hehe..
Callie and everyone else.. you are good people... and deserve to have the best out of life like everyone else!.
P.S... I have seen so many transformation pictures of here where beautiful women become much thinner and often times looke like completly different people.. and more often than not think to myself...
"God if only she dabbed on a little make-up now and got rid of that old lady hairstyle..she would truly feel better about herself".. A lot of us hid that way with the not making ourselves get attention so we could blend in and not feel any more singled out!!.
WELL HONEY THOSE DAYS ARE OVER!!!!!!!.
Luv ya all!..
See no one is giving up here.....
What makes this more important is knowing your not alone....
Its not only me that loves ya.... xxx.
WE ALL DO..
Callie, first of all I want to ask you this: if it was one of us who wrote this post plse tell us what your advice or what would you say to us? I'm sure you would not stand for us to call ourselves stupid now would you? You, Buzz/Andy, Doubleb, UpNorth and many others are the reason I stay on this site. This site is so HORRIBLE to navigate around and takes so long to load that if not for you guys I would have left a long time ago. I search for your posts first and know that I will get abundant resources from you. Just ask a question and if you don't know the answer you are on that computer finding one for us, now that sure doesn't seem like something a "studpid" person would do! I know right now you aren't able to go out and run like you want with the weather in WA and all, but I LOVED the suggestion that someone else left about the puddles, boy would you be a big hit with your kids!I know things are pretty rough at your house right now, but with your husband home why don't you take a day "off" and just pamper yourself! Take a long hot bath and read a book while you're in the tub, or give yourself a pedi or whatever else it is that YOU like to do, just take some time to do it! We're here for ya and.
We can help...
Callie, every time I see your picture when you post I always think how pretty you are. I bet other ppl look at you and think that too. I'm so happy to hear from you because my.
Is tomorrow and I was hoping you would pray for me. now I have a reason to pray for you too, and I will.Please try to see yourself as the rest of us see you.I think you're beautiful...
Callie, What a stalwart you are on this site and I agree with those ahead of me, you have helped so many folks with your kind and wise responses. I've been praying about what I could say that would lift you up and encourage you......
Stupid - NOT! I have a bad habit of negative self talk about my husband and I am desparately trying to change from all of that. It's amazing how often I participate in it. Each time I catch myself, I ask.
And remind myself that I"M NOT GOING THERE!!! It's almost like wearing a rubber band and popping it every time I allow the negative thinking to come in. Right now it is just a step by step, inch by inch, day by day process, but I am confident that in due time, I will find that this occurs less and less..... What we feed grows, what we starve dies!.
New person - YES! Boy do I relate to this one. Every time I look in the mirror I marvel at the change and I tell myself that I truly am a new creation and I am NOT THE PERSON THAT I USED TO BE! I don't behave as I used to be...totally focused on what "crap" I was going to stick in my mouth next....etc. I am excited about discovering who I really am now. I don't need to hide behind the weight or whatever else I've created to hide behind! It's like a prime opportunity to learn how to do it right now and I don't just mean eat and live in my new body. I really do have a new lease on life and the sky's the limit. What an exciting time to rejoice in the good things that are ahead of me..
Callie, you are younger than I and are so beautiful on the outside as well as the inside. Celebrate that!!!! Hey, find someone who is giving a makeup party (Mary Kay cosmetics does it and Stanley used to have them too) Invite a bunch of friends and have a blast trying the products and learn the techniques. In that kind of environment, without the need to make a purchase, you can have a great time experimenting and just enjoying each others company..
It is way great fun to go to the store and try on a bunch of clothes and often be surprised by new styles you never thought you'd find yourself wearing, much less to discover the different sizes..
Callie, I can't not express to you the joy I feel from my relationship with my loving heavenly Father who loved me so much that He sent His Son, Jesus to give me a brand new life. I am so far from anything complete, but I don't know how I could exist in this life without that relationship. He is truly all I need..
That something that I have said blesses you in even a small way! I have truly been blessed by your posts. Thank you for your honest transparency! This will all work out!!!!!..
Don't let "feeling stupid" stop you from doing ANYTHING!.
Here's a life secret that most people do not know:.
People are too consumed with worrying about what YOU think about them, that they seldom are thinking about you..
Trust me. You simply have a low self-image that needs to be built up. That takes time. You have all the tools now. Start building. Live your life, and when you get any kind of affirmation, celebrate it.
That will also build up your self-worth, which has taken a beating over the years. I was a stay-at-home Mom, too. And it is a thankless job with few "atta-girl" moments, if any. Don't get me wrong, it is an extremely important job, but you need to find sources outside your home for stimulation and appreciation. I found value and appreciation in doing.
You have great value, my dear. And you are worth the effort you spend on YOU..
God bless you, hun...
Have you talked to your personal doctor about some of your concerns? I know that when I started medication many years ago, it changed my life. I would literally panic at stop lights and freeze at the smallest decisions. And forget going out in public....no way. Sometimes my family and I would be in the middle of grocery shopping and just have to.
Immediately because I would start freaking out. And I was relatively thin at that time. Once I was put on medication for anxiety, my world changed dramatically. And you have been through some pretty dramatic physiological changes in the last year or so. You might just need a little chemical boost to help you over this. I.
I'm not being too forward, but I think you are an amazing young lady and want you to be able to realize that as much as the rest of us do...